My book, The Wolf at the Door: Undue Influence and Elder Financial Abuse, is now two years old. I enjoyed writing the book and I now enjoy the fruits from the reception that it has received.
Part of this enjoyment is my increased opportunity to speak with people from all walks of life and circumstances. While I occasionally speak before groups or appear on radio shows, my most common communication is with people that call us to discuss their concerns or a possible case.
While many of these calls identify real financial elder abuse, a substantial number of these inquiries describe conduct that doesn't rise to the level of statutory elder abuse. That said, the conduct described can truly be sad.
The frustrations of dealing with parents with memory loss does take its toll. While understandable, it is disquieting to see an adult child berating an elder with a scolding "you just said that, dad" or "you've said that five times, mom." There are better ways to handle this.
Children dealing with parents and memory loss can get a lot of help and advice from associations that provide information on Alzheimer's disease. Grandparents take joy in their grandchildren. In some ways it's a joy that you can't describe unless you're a grandparent.
Proverbs 17:6 puts it well: "Grandchildren are the crown of the elderly..." It hurts if the crown is taken away. There is great power in just being present to each other. Present to a parent suffering from memory loss. Present to a parent who is lonely.
Present to a parent who yearns to see their grandchildren, and present to an elder whose time on this earth may be short but whose love for family should not be shunned.